Bona Fide Beauty: Practical Steps to the Pursuit of True Beauty

Here is the conclusion of Darleen's encouraging thoughts on Bona Fide Beauty...

There are three perspectives and four practices every woman should understand in the pursuit of true beauty. Perspective is important. The way we see life, is the way we live life. “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he” (Proverbs 23:7). Paul emphasized the importance of our thought life as foundational to a successful Christian journey; therefore, he exhorts us to set our minds on things above:

If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God. When Christ, who is our life, shall appear, then shall ye also appear with him in glory. Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry. (Colossians 3:1-5)

There are three ways we can practically set our minds on things above in regard to our beauty pursuit. First, each of us needs to resolve whom it is that we are pleasing in our quest for beauty - for single women there is one, and one only whom we should seek to please. Every thought, every motive, and every action in regard to beauty should be for the eyes of God alone. Scripture gives us some standards for this in 1 Timothy 2:9-10, which says, “In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.”

“Wait!” you single ladies may interject. “What about winning a husband?” “Won’t good looks and a shapely body serve me in this endeavor?”

“Yes, it will,” was the reply of Kevin Weston, a current student of Moody Bible Institute. Yet, he continued to say that the body is often over emphasized. “Personality has more affect on a person than good looks,” said this young man. He also expressed that a joyful spirit reflects true beauty from the heart. How true. By looking to God, our trust can just radiate from our countenance and that is, without doubt, attractive to others. Our first impressions as we meet various young men might be motivated by looks, and we might say, “oh, he isn’t very handsome!” As we get to know him better, observing his godly character, and love for God, his looks are suddenly transformed! Now we must agree that he is a good looking guy, right? If this happens to us, I believe the same is true with godly men. Proverbs 11:22 illustrates what beauty without character looks like. A woman who is beautiful and lacks character, or discretion as the Bible says, is as comical as a pig with a gold ring in its snout. It is no use depending on outer adornment to try to cover all the things that would be unattractive in our character. Our hope in God is what produces true inner beauty, not the outer garb of good looks and a nice body.

As noted, we are all fading away in our bodily form; therefore, I doubt that any of us who are single women would want to catch a husband using our physical beauty and shapely bodies as bait. Someone once told me, “When it goes away, he goes away.” By waiting on God’s timing we have no need to secure winning a husband. God is more than able to bring a man into our life who loves us just the way we are and who is attracted to our natural beauty.

The second perspective is to know that what God has created is good and of extreme value. We must accept God’s sovereign design for the body He has given to us. Why? Because God created us, and He called that creation “good” in Genesis 1:31. Scripture says that we are fearfully and wonderfully made (See Psalm 139:14). “Psalms 45:11 tells us that the King (Jesus) is enthralled by our beauty and that we should honor Him because of it.” God determined our size and what we would look like. Before we were born, we did not have a choice about what color of eyes, hair, or skin we would have. It was pre-determined by an all-wise, all-powerful, and all-loving Heavenly Father. We are to accept with gratefulness His design, knowing that He does all things for His glory and for our ultimate good.

Third, we must recognize that our body is not our own. In 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 we are told we are temples of the Holy Spirit. “…ye are not your own. For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's.” There is no higher praise to receive than to know that we are the temple of God! “Temples are beautiful. They cost money. In this case, the ability to dwell within us cost Christ everything. It is hard to accept this truth without realizing that we have value and worth.” The final portion of this passage is very important to understand. We are told to “glorify (or honor) God with your bodies.” We need to be careful how we treat our bodies, making sure to treat them with special care.

With these perspectives of higher things, we also need to practice replacing the vanity in our life with the pursuit of godliness. Upon asking Mrs. Erin Davis for some practical steps in pursuing a Godly beauty she gave me four vital points.

First and foremost, “study the Word. The Bible is rich in assurances of your worth. Often the writing is downright romantic! Study what God has to say about you!” The second crucial point: “Guard your eyes. Shield yourself from images of beauty that are superficial or cause you to feel bad about yourself.” The third point: “Cultivate inner beauty. Spend time in silence. Work on nurturing the fruit of the Spirit in your life. Serve others. Find practical ways to work harder at building inner beauty than you do at crafting outer beauty.” The fourth and final point Mrs. Davis encourages is to “spend time with woman who have embraced their God-given beauty and who will encourage you to do the same. Find friends who esteem you and encourage you to base your worth on the right standards.”

In conclusion, we see how the pursuit of our physical beauty is like chasing the wind. It is successful in nothing. Initially, back in the Garden of Eden where physical beauty was valued more than lasting inner beauty, these lies embedded themselves in human hearts. We are all prone to place our faith in this lie and live out this erroneous belief. Yet, there is hope in Christ. The Truth is able to set us free from the transitory nature of putting undue priority on physical appearance. Consequently, by replacing the lie with truth, we are able to pursue true beauty. The inward confidence and peace that comes from trusting and knowing God is at the heart of true beauty. Let us be women of true beauty, continually cultivating the lasting bona fide beauty in our hearts.

Darleen Waltman, a 23-year old homeschool graduate and the second of 8 children, is a native Texan currently transplanted with her family in the state of Tennessee. :o) Darleen is fluent in Spanish, a talented freelance photographer, gifted in working with children and animals, and, best of all, she's my first cousin and a wonderful friend! Check out the Waltman family happenings here, or read Darleen's complete article, "Bona Fide Beauty", here.